Oh. Gone are the days of baby gurgles and coos.  Fewer and fewer mispronounciations of everyday words.  I am still in denial and will forever say “nerdles” instead of noodles.  Even when Superman is in his forties.  It’s creepy, I know, but I’m fairly certain it’s all I’ll have. Gone are the days of spelling…

Preferably Butt Ugly ones. Because nothing rubs my ego the wrong way than when my girlfriends show up at an event looking just as hot (if not more so) than me. I’m tired of the sexy haircuts, the updated makeup, the skinny jeans and pretty patterned tops.  I want some drawstring-pants-wearing-mullet-hair-sporting-gold-capped-teeth ladies in my life. The…

For Immediate Release: October 31st, 2009 – Orange County, California Authorities have yet to comment on the last two days’ events, keeping details of local attacks on an innocent woman quiet for now.  Due to the sensitive and graphic nature of the crimes, local law enforcement is handling this as a high profile case. The victim…

Subject 1 contacts Subject 2 for a Saturday afternoon excursion to local Target. Subject 2 quickly agrees and wipes drool from face. Subject 1 and 2 enjoy Starbucks pit stop to fortify themselves prior to entering said Target.  Subject 1 attempts to hog radio station selection.  Subject 2 quickly asserts herself and after brief scuffle…

Nola is lost. She is our one year old cat.  Grey and white, with a crooked tail, we adopted her last fall when our first family cat, Lulu, disappeared one windy day. Now we are reliving the nightmare.  Superman still cries for Lulu when he is exhausted or run down.  His defenses gone, he misses…

Yes.You are right.It is a mean title.And maybe a bit extreme.But weilding my power on my blog via a shallow and mean title makes me feel just a bit better. Because my stupid little sister just ran her first half-marathon yesterday and even though she’s worked really hard since March, and even though she’s committed, devoted,…

I know what you’re thinking.  “Boy, that Jo.  She’s got it so together.”“What a perfect example of strength, integrity, passion, and impeccable comedic timing.”“Man, if ever there was a talented, well-rounded, Polish-American woman with dual citizenship, that Jo sure would take the cake.” Yes you are.You are too thinking that.You may not realize that you’re…