My best friend’s little girl had her birthday party this weekend.

It was a princess-themed occasion, complete with a Rapunzel character (more on her later) and a tea party, with sparkling pink lemonade (because who actually drinks tea at these things?) served in tiny pink cups.

Now, being a mother of two boys, one of which is permanently attached to his baseball glove and Star Wars Legos, this gathering of giggling girls was a bit of a respite from the sweaty violence that ensues during a boy’s birthday party. In fact, we marveled at how calm and quiet the girls were being as Rapunzel led them through frolicking renditions of freeze tag and asked poignant questions such as “Do you think I should get a haircut?” and “Don’t you just hate it when your Prince Charming forgets to sweep you off your feet?”

Plus, it also made me reminisce about my own days of pink tulle and satin ribbons, though being a child of conservative immigrant parents who refused to waste their money on overpriced costumes, my princess attire comprised of hand-me-downs from the promiscuous teen who live down the street from us and would babysit me sometimes. Thanks to her, I was definitely rocking the 80’s coke whore look, but dainty fairy princess? Notsomuch.

Anyways

It was during this little gathering that I realized a few things:

1.  I’m in the wrong business. Rapunzel commands $150.00 per hour to sit on fuzzy blankets under blossoming trees and lie through her teeth about living happily every after (ha! not in this economy!) to a bunch of naive little girls doused in glitter and drenched in lead-infused jewelery made in China.

2. I’ve worn trashy blond wigs for a lot less

3. The world would be a much better place if we all stopped and had ourselves an old fashioned tea party now and then.  There’s something magical about drinking sweet beverages (or straight gin, whatever your preference) from dainty cups ten times smaller than the ones in your cupboards. For some reason, they’re also way more fun to wash. I really think we could solve all sorts of crises here and abroad over some fancy sandwiches without crusts served on miniature place settings.

And nothing says “Let’s get down to brass tacks” (I honestly do not get enough opportunities to say that!) like drinking with your pinky extended proudly in the air.

Something extraordinary happens to little girls when they sit in half circles wearing beautiful fabrics, nibbling on delicious refreshments, and pondering happily ever after.

Of course something else entirely happens when the same girls turn 18, get fake id’s, hike up those dresses and trade in those marabou slippers for some black leather stiletto boots.

Have I mentioned how thrilled I am to have two boys?

 

*How cute is this little tea set I got for my best friend’s daughter?!  Okay, so it’s a little less “tea” and more “mimosa” but other than the fact that it kinda promotes underage drinking and is completely inappropriate, it’s darling, right?