oh andrew.It has been a steady declinegaining momentum in the last few monthsand two weeks ago, you could no longer finish out your school daymommy driving to pick you up, before lunchcarrying you in my arms past laughing childrenbiting my tongue all the way to the carbecause some of the things that want to escape…
I Want My Brain Cells Back
It’s been a little over a year since I decided to stop watching the news. Something about waking up to a steaming cup of coffee and up to date information on local slayings, drug busts, and deadly swine/bird/armadillo flu outbreaks unnerved me and made it hard for me to focus on my job as a…
Brush Front
We’ve had a heck of a time getting Andrew to brush his teeth lately. And given the fact that his two front teeth have a combined surface area equivalent to a regulation football field, most things within a three mile radius find their way onto his chompers and we’re forced to brush. Often. A few…
I’m All for Recycling, But…………
The other day I found myself at my local health store, aka the “Everything Here is Disgustingly Overpriced But You’re Desperate Enough To Pay It So We’re Gonna Charge It” store, looking for some specific supplements for Andrew. A nice young man wearing Birkenstocks and reeking of cologne that had a striking resemblance to my…
Ten Signs You’re a Holiday Jackass – Part 1
10. When you call your hostess to ask what you should bring to dinner and she suggests a side dish, you show up with a half empty bottle of homemade vodka and a box of Chicken in a Biskit. 9. You use words like “me, mine, I, my, and myself” when asking how everyone else is doing, i.e, “I am myself curious…
A Not So Private Anniversary Note
Oh Honey!Where do I begin? Here I lay wedged between two boyswhile you slumber away on a twin mattress belowa compromise, you say, until I get off my hiney and implement a viable solution to what has clearly become a standoff(I think we are losing) Not necessarily romantic but such is our life togetheras we take turnslaughingcryingfalling apartreaching…
Father/Son Time Can Suck It
So, Andrew and I are on our own this weekend.Ian and Mikey are spending the next four days at Joshua Tree. Mikey calls it “an annual bonding trip for boys and their dads.”I call it Kidnapping. Though, as far as going against your will goes, Ian was less “help me mommy, please save me from…