We got the bad news late last night.
“We regret to inform you that your adoption application was denied.”
I was grateful the boys were sleeping; I didn’t have the heart to tell Ian yet. After all, he was the one that initiated the process by telling us how badly he wanted us to adopt little Callie in the first place. One look at her and we all fell in love. Sure, there were others, but we knew that Callie would complete our family like no other.
I thought back to the pages of paperwork I had meticulously filled out, answering every question to my best ability, agreeing to every term – including a full home inspection. Where had I gone wrong? What had I missed?
Oh! If only I could turn back the clock!
If only there was another way!
If only I had considered the exact location of the litter box more carefully!
Oh, I’m sorry. Are you confused?
Did you think that I was talking about a child adoption?
Because, you see, Callie is a kitten and in order to be considered worthy enough to adopt her, I had to fill out an application approximately 2.5 inches thick. An application filled with questions such as:
“Do you like cats?”
“Do you like cats a lot?”
“Do you like cats so much it’s kind of creepy?”
“If Cat A left the litterbox at approximately 10:02 and Cat B entered the litterbox at approximately 10:03 and was constipated, would you get mad if Cat C crapped in the bathtub?”
“How many cats does it take to officially turn someone into a total loser incapable of having any human friends?”
The last question was my favorite though:
“What makes you the prefect person to adopt this cat?”
Hmmm. Let’s see. I’ll give it food and shelter. Also, I won’t turn it into Chinese food.
Now that I think about it, maybe that last part was a bit too much and though I can’t be sure, there’s a slight chance it may have influenced the foster family’s decision.
We were DENIED A CAT.
“Hi Joanna,Unfortunately you do not meet our criteria for adoption.Not all groups have the same criteria so I’m sure you will find a kitty. Thank you for thinking rescue.”
– Mary Kay
It’s a new low for the Ashline Family.