Some people don’t trust the IRS or their next door neighbor or their significant other. I don’t trust my body. I wait in earnest, each day, for it to fail me. Holding my breathe in anticipation, a flicker of pain, a persistent twitch, an unwelcome jolt of Something Is Wrong I notice. Each. and Every.…
What’s Next? A Home Cooked Meal and Warm Slippers? Geesh.
The other day my husband mentioned that he missed seeing me all dressed up. His exact words were, “I miss seeing you all dressed up.” I think he’s trying to tell me something. This blatant disregard for my feelings can only mean one of two things: He doesn’t love me anymore or He’s developed a…
Ten Things I Learned at My Oprah Audition
Recently I bragged that I was going to do this, and fulfill my destiny of becoming rich and famous. I stand before you today, neither rich, nor famous, and with a slightly bruised and battered ego. Here’s what I learned from my short-lived quest for fame. 10. I was not the only one to get…
Congratulations
I love this season of Graduations. It’s a time of change; bittersweet goodbyes intermingled with the dizzy excitement of new beginnings. Endless possibilities. Memories made. New ones waiting just around the bend. Today, as I sat in my classroom with a young sampling of our country’s future (who were busy building wooden block castles and…
iGrownup?
When I was a child, hell, when I was a teenager, my television viewing was incredibly censored by my overbearing, paranoid, well-meaning parents. My sister and I weren’t allowed to watch any tv shows or movies that depicted actors kissing, women who wore too much makeup, or unruly farm animals. This left us with…
Five Seconds of Perfection
Have you everbeen absorbedin somethingmundane like laundrypiled high mismatched socksimpatiently awaitingyour undivided attention when something tells youto turn your headbecause Life is Happening and you catch a glimpse of itand your heart begins to flutterand you feel tingly and alive and every part of your beingfrom your toes to your very soulare basking in the glow of…
I’m Not Entirely Sure, But I May Belong in the Zoo……
I’m going to sum up my day with the following: Today I read a story about a baby elephant named “Ellie” to my kindergarten class.“Ellie” loves to eat peanuts, play in the mud, and cuddle with her mommy. “Ellie” weighs less than me. A baby elephant. Weighs less than me. That is all.