I let
an unruly email
get the best of me
as my ego slowly bruised
black and blue
the world once again revolved only around me

the sudden wail
of a tiny blonde angel
as she fell off of the steel structure
mere feet from me
her left hand visibly broken
a mangled mess that
I could not fix
her mother
gracious enough
not to punch me out
as I handed her daughter in a condition
much worse than when she left her with me

a silent drive home
three kiddos munching on trans fat
as I pull up to the driveway
my mother leaning againt white stucco
her face swollen and red from tears
her hands shaking as she nods her head in disbelief
a 25 year old girl
she knew
had seen just on Monday
run over on an Orange County Freeway
after checking
on a flat tire
her parents in Poland
cannot hold their daughter
grieving across the ocean
I gag
as I think of their

and then
I make
frozen pizza for dinner
write out my shopping list for Trader Joe’s
trying to stay grateful
instead of pissed off and confused
questioning the validity of
25 year olds dying
and children crying
and suddenly crappy emails
don’t seem so freakin important
and neither does
my stupid shopping list

Lady Gaga
beckons my son to my side
and I serenade him
promise to always be his
his little body
much too small for his seven years
pressed against mine
twirling in the living room
it is a moment I do not take for granted
I am not promised
much of anything

am I?

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